I am a little embarrassed about my minor melt-down post a couple of days ago. I promise y'all, I'm usually not such a wimp. Thanks so much for the supportive comments, they meant a lot. Things are just . . . I don't know. I have gotten really great news about a couple of important things over the past 24 hours, but I honestly couldn't even summon much of a reaction to the good news. That makes me feel like an ungrateful @#$%#, but everything is just numb, I have too much to think about to let myself feel anything. Even though the ED issues are not new, this level of stress about other things is definitely unprecedented. I feel like I'm on the cusp of a "quarter-life crisis" (ha), trying to figure out where I need to aim myself (recovery-wise, mostly, but in other areas as well) and why it's worth the effort.
I had an extremely rough session with H. today. I've just got way too many things zinging around my mind and way too little time/energy to focus on getting them sorted out. I'm not going to let this turn into a whine session like the last post. I just wanted to let you know that I appreciated the comments and support, this is supposed to be a recovery blog and I am indeed trying to work my way in that direction. I think Dori says it best:
1 comment:
Cammy,
Actually, I was proud of you for that last post. I know those freak outs well, and while not all freak outs are productive, some ARE. I think your body and mind are trying to tell you something.
Part of recovery is learning about this give and take- not just giving support but being open to receiving it, too. We're here for you.
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