I really stink at birthdays.
I just feel like such a failure at being a real person when my mom asks over and over again what I want to do, and I don't want to go out to eat, I don't want a cake, I don't want to go to a movie that interferes with my workout schedule, and I don't want anything that she really wants to give me to feel/show that she's a caring parent.
7 comments:
Sorry things are so hard for you right now. I know how you feel, I havent had cake on my birthday in years~ this birthday WILL be different! DONT beat yourself up though, you'll get there. it takes time!!
Dana xo
http://happinessiswithinblog.com/
Oh my, I thought I was the only one! I am exactly the same. Happy Birthday!
I think we are all confused, Cammy. How is refusing cake and working out instead of enjoying time with your family going to facilitate weight restoration?
is there anything else you want for your birthday that has nothing to do with food or parties? Birthday's can be high stress, no matter who you are. is there something you would like that has nothing to do with anyone else's expectations?
Happy Birthday. hope there is something you like that will feel nice.
I'm glad I'm not alone in this! I'm exactly the same about birthdays. I never know what presents to suggest when people ask what I want, either.
I think the most important thing to do is not to beat yourself up or stress about not wanting to do so-called 'normal' celebratory things. If you need your workout schedule to feel normal, then stick to it. At the same time though, it might the perfect chance to push your boundaries just a little: maybe try some 'fun' exercise like ski-ing or something (no idea what appeals/is available). Maybe there are some 'safer' foods that you enjoy but wouldn't normally have (e.g berries or fresh chilli peppers rather than dried)?
I really, really hope that you find something that works for you and that you feel better soon. Recovery is hard, hard work but it can and will feel better one day. Just remember how well you've done so far.
Birthday's are always hard for me. I decided last year that I am going to start MAKING NEW MEMORIES and stop living in the past! Don't feel pressured! Just make it the one day you do whatever you want to do and relax! I actually decided to 'celebrate' my birthday on another day, and spend my actual birthday just doing what I wanted-alone. it took the pressure off, and my celebration was just another day celebrating it by going to the movies. It really took the pressure off of the "birthday" celebration heavy feeling!!
I have a suggestion. Why not make it a day to spend in reflection? Reflecting on how far you've come, how you feel about yourself as a person, set some goals you want to achieve, revisit your past goals/priorities, see how far you've come and make a promise to yourself along with a plan to keep going and taking care of yourself. Maybe make a list of little things you want to try/achieve; spontaneous fun things etc. Write down all the things you are thankful for and meditate on that. Not only will you feel more gratitude, but you will feel much happier as well! I find truly being thankful and understanding how blessed we really are, shift our paradigm/filter with which we view things for the better! It brings optimism!
Barbara
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