I've talked before about how satisfied I've been with the Pill (none of the side effects some people dread from it, nice weight redistribution), but I have one gripe: in the process of going on/off of placebo week. I get pretty dramatic mood swings. I was on top of the world yesterday, and tonight I specifically avoided all phone calls because I was afraid I'd just end up crying in the unlucky caller's ear. Such is life. Fortunately the mood swings (for me) are only in the transition days between the placebo pills and the real hormone ones (or actually from no pills to the hormone pills; I never actually bother to take the placebo ones, just take a break from the pack for a week).
I just discovered the blog Eat the Damn Cake, it's pretty awesome. Definitely my recommendation d'jour, especially this post: This One is Your Real Body.
A friend of mine invited me to go to a power yoga class with her tomorrow morning, and it's given me a maddening amount of stress over what should be a simple decision. The main issues are 1) is that it's during my normal workout time, and thus would automatically interfere with routine (What! The OCD monster is rumbling to life...), and 2) I also have no idea how it would compare to my usual workouts in terms of energy, which means I don't know how much it could substitute for, whether to count it against my exercise budget (at a time when I'm trying to cut back), how I should time my food intake in relation to it, and a million other calculations/quantifications/evaluations. Welcome to my brain, watch where you step because it's a mess. This is really frustrating me tonight, because it's just this kind of bullshit that eventually robbed me of all the team sports I used to be involved in, Ironically, I couldn't play sports because they interfered with my exercise routines. Makes a ton of sense, right? Anyway, we'll see.
I blamed the Pill for my mood swings, but it seems as though the fact that I haven't slept for more than 4 hours per night (and never 4 contiguous hours) since sometime last week is probably not insignificant. Hence I should probably wrap this up. I hope everyone's week is off to a great start.
Monday, January 30, 2012
Sunday, January 29, 2012
Baffling Body Works
I have actually had a really great week; my mood was pretty high, despite a few external stressors going on. I was on top of the world yesterday for no immediately discernable reason. I had a pretty kickass session with D. on Wednesday, as mentioned in my last post, and it really lit a fire under me to start tackling some real exercise challenges. I think I was finally at a point at which I was realizing--and, more powerfully, resenting--just how much those routines really do control my day and rob me of a lot of productivity and life experience. I also think this week was the first time I really started to believe that I can eventually get a handle on this, and that really helped me in putting myself into action mode.
The important part to me is not just to do it a few times to prove that I can, but to make the reduced amount into the new norm. And then work on progressively creating newer norms until things are where they should be. I am an incredible creature of habit, and making something into routine is really critical for me in 1) remaining compliant and 2) not freaking out.
My body is an enigma to me sometimes. For the past few days I have been hungry.as.hell. I honestly don't think I've felt unhungry in days. I don't just mean that my tummy is a little growly, I mean like "my stomach is going to consume itself from the inside out" hungry. And even though I have not reduced food at all (woot) despite the exercise cuts, my weight has been incrementally down a little bit for the past few days.
All of which highlights the degree to which we're misguided sometimes when we treat body and energy maintenance as a simple "in versus out" equation, especially during the recovery process. As Carrie pointed out on Twitter last night (see her excellent post on the science behind hypermetabolism) when I was whining about the hunger issue, oftentimes if your body suddenly has extra energy available, it will rev up and burn it, and sometimes even burn some extra while it's at it. Bodies are not nearly as passive as we sometimes seem to think.
I went through periodic hypermetabolic stages during earlier weight restoration, and did not miss it. I know the omnipresent "fitness"industry is always advising us to maximize our metabolisms! increase your calorie burn while sitting still! eat these five foods that burn more energy than they contain!, but believe me, it's confusing and frustrating when your body function changes and suddenly your balance is completely disrupted.
Anyway, I'm highly aware that the logical response to being hungry all the time and seeing weight drop is to . . . eat more. Imagine that. As T. pointed out, you're (and by you I mean me) not being fair if you claim to sometimes undereat because you're "just not hungry" and then don't allow yourself a supplement when you are actually famished. I think that if I hadn't been doing the exercise cuts this week I might have been a little more liberal in allowing myself extra calories. Another factor (which I am obviously using to rationalize my actions, acknowledged) is that I'm going to be traveling away from home for over half the days in February, and am really getting the pre-travel anxiety about how my body will handle all of that, the sort of anticipatory clenching down to pre-compensate. Not by restricting, but just by being terrified to boost anything at all. I don't say that as justification, more of explanation, I guess. Going to work on that this week.
I get to see M. soon! We tend to have a sort of U-shape in our interactions in between visits--we end a visit on a huge love-high and are really happy with each other, then after a couple of weeks we get cranky, lonely, etc and have a fight, then make up and rise back to the top of the mood-closeness curve in anticipation of seeing each other again. I think we've been good at making the U a little bit shallower each time, but I'm just glad we both recognize the pattern enough to know that we spend most of the time near the top.
Anyway, I hope everyone has had a great week. Despite the metabolic woes and a few stressful things, I've been feeling really awesome lately. Participatory prompts: 1) Have any morphing metabolism stories to share? 2) Tell me something great that happened to you this week?
The important part to me is not just to do it a few times to prove that I can, but to make the reduced amount into the new norm. And then work on progressively creating newer norms until things are where they should be. I am an incredible creature of habit, and making something into routine is really critical for me in 1) remaining compliant and 2) not freaking out.
My body is an enigma to me sometimes. For the past few days I have been hungry.as.hell. I honestly don't think I've felt unhungry in days. I don't just mean that my tummy is a little growly, I mean like "my stomach is going to consume itself from the inside out" hungry. And even though I have not reduced food at all (woot) despite the exercise cuts, my weight has been incrementally down a little bit for the past few days.
All of which highlights the degree to which we're misguided sometimes when we treat body and energy maintenance as a simple "in versus out" equation, especially during the recovery process. As Carrie pointed out on Twitter last night (see her excellent post on the science behind hypermetabolism) when I was whining about the hunger issue, oftentimes if your body suddenly has extra energy available, it will rev up and burn it, and sometimes even burn some extra while it's at it. Bodies are not nearly as passive as we sometimes seem to think.
I went through periodic hypermetabolic stages during earlier weight restoration, and did not miss it. I know the omnipresent "fitness"industry is always advising us to maximize our metabolisms! increase your calorie burn while sitting still! eat these five foods that burn more energy than they contain!, but believe me, it's confusing and frustrating when your body function changes and suddenly your balance is completely disrupted.
Anyway, I'm highly aware that the logical response to being hungry all the time and seeing weight drop is to . . . eat more. Imagine that. As T. pointed out, you're (and by you I mean me) not being fair if you claim to sometimes undereat because you're "just not hungry" and then don't allow yourself a supplement when you are actually famished. I think that if I hadn't been doing the exercise cuts this week I might have been a little more liberal in allowing myself extra calories. Another factor (which I am obviously using to rationalize my actions, acknowledged) is that I'm going to be traveling away from home for over half the days in February, and am really getting the pre-travel anxiety about how my body will handle all of that, the sort of anticipatory clenching down to pre-compensate. Not by restricting, but just by being terrified to boost anything at all. I don't say that as justification, more of explanation, I guess. Going to work on that this week.
I get to see M. soon! We tend to have a sort of U-shape in our interactions in between visits--we end a visit on a huge love-high and are really happy with each other, then after a couple of weeks we get cranky, lonely, etc and have a fight, then make up and rise back to the top of the mood-closeness curve in anticipation of seeing each other again. I think we've been good at making the U a little bit shallower each time, but I'm just glad we both recognize the pattern enough to know that we spend most of the time near the top.
Anyway, I hope everyone has had a great week. Despite the metabolic woes and a few stressful things, I've been feeling really awesome lately. Participatory prompts: 1) Have any morphing metabolism stories to share? 2) Tell me something great that happened to you this week?
Wednesday, January 25, 2012
Return to D. is Vindicated
I had a session with my dietician this morning, and we did not specifically mention food once the entire hour. And honestly, it was one of the most productive/thought provoking therapy sessions I've had in a long time.
The irony abounds, right? I'l take it.
The irony abounds, right? I'l take it.
Monday, January 23, 2012
Watermelons and Stuff
I'm starting to get blogger's guilt for not updating for a while, but I haven't really had much to say. Pretty much 'same old same old' around here I suppose. I feel like this entire semester is just a holding pattern in which I putter around keeping myself busy while I wait to find out what direction my life will go in next (meaning where I will be moving for my PhD).
Anyway, an unplanned guilt post means you get randoms:
--My sleep has been screwy this week. I am usually one of the world's most consistent sleepers (fall asleep between 11-12, wake up 6:00-6:15 with no alarm), but the other night I randomly just got up and surfed the web, texted with a friend on the west coast, etc from 2:00-4:30, then was wide awake at 5:30 again. I guess I had a lot on my mind. That was Saturday, and then last night Match and I had a blow-up fight (we have them infrequently but I hate them more than anything when they happen) that had me up til 1 again. I feel like I should have passed out by now, as it's almost midnight again, but behold, the wonder of caffeine.
--The fight picked up again this morning, and I am 100% convinced neither of us could have told you what started the spat in the first place, it was that ridiculous. I think one reason they tend to drag out for us is that we have very different coping strategies. After we have said what we need to say and are not in inflammatory mode, I *need* alone time to cool off and repair myself (note that this is after we've hashed it out and are aimed towards making up, I don't withdraw in the midst of a discussion). I will definitely get over it, but I need to do that in private, and then I'm happy to re-engage and be back to normal. He, on the other hand, doesn't want to disengage until he's convinced everything is completely fine and happy. Which, if you are dealing with someone who has to have some recharge time to be okay, is an exercise in futility and frustration on both sides. I don't think either way is right or wrong, they are just glaringly incompatible when coupled. Participatory prompt: do you need alone time to get over an argument?
--In evaluating what my lifestyle will probably be like for at least the next few years (lots of time in Third World countries), I've convinced myself that I really need Lasix, for myriad reasons related to hygiene and convenience. I can't figure out how I'd pay for it, though, and honestly the idea of anyone doing anything to my eyes really scares me. Participatory prompt #2: has anyone out there had Lasix, and if so how was the recovery, are you happy with results?
--I love that even though my dog is showing his age more and more, he still acts like a puppy when his favorite squeaky tennis ball is brought out. It's one of those little things that is guaranteed to make me smile no matter what kind of day I'm having. Participatory prompt #3: Tell me something cute that your dog does? Or your cat, or your kid, or whatever other small animal that might be living in your house.
--I really wish I lived within reasonable visiting distance of any of my friends from college or high school. I've been pretty lonely lately.
--I got to teach a couple of classes for my adviser when he was out sick last week, LOVED it. I really get a great feeling from explaining things and convincing bored college students of how kickass my little corner of science is.
--I think it's time for Ryan Gosling to make a new movie, I need a fix.
--According to today's page on my Page-A-Day trivia calendar (nerd alert), it takes 100 gallons of water to grow the average watermelon? Which is approximately how much I always have to pee after eating watermelon...the cycle suddenly makes sense.
--I always, always have a Page-A-Day calendar and at least 2 wall calendars for any given year.
I'm starting to feel at risk of face-planting on the keyboard, so I better sign off. Hope Monday treated everyone well, love y'all.
Anyway, an unplanned guilt post means you get randoms:
--My sleep has been screwy this week. I am usually one of the world's most consistent sleepers (fall asleep between 11-12, wake up 6:00-6:15 with no alarm), but the other night I randomly just got up and surfed the web, texted with a friend on the west coast, etc from 2:00-4:30, then was wide awake at 5:30 again. I guess I had a lot on my mind. That was Saturday, and then last night Match and I had a blow-up fight (we have them infrequently but I hate them more than anything when they happen) that had me up til 1 again. I feel like I should have passed out by now, as it's almost midnight again, but behold, the wonder of caffeine.
--The fight picked up again this morning, and I am 100% convinced neither of us could have told you what started the spat in the first place, it was that ridiculous. I think one reason they tend to drag out for us is that we have very different coping strategies. After we have said what we need to say and are not in inflammatory mode, I *need* alone time to cool off and repair myself (note that this is after we've hashed it out and are aimed towards making up, I don't withdraw in the midst of a discussion). I will definitely get over it, but I need to do that in private, and then I'm happy to re-engage and be back to normal. He, on the other hand, doesn't want to disengage until he's convinced everything is completely fine and happy. Which, if you are dealing with someone who has to have some recharge time to be okay, is an exercise in futility and frustration on both sides. I don't think either way is right or wrong, they are just glaringly incompatible when coupled. Participatory prompt: do you need alone time to get over an argument?
--In evaluating what my lifestyle will probably be like for at least the next few years (lots of time in Third World countries), I've convinced myself that I really need Lasix, for myriad reasons related to hygiene and convenience. I can't figure out how I'd pay for it, though, and honestly the idea of anyone doing anything to my eyes really scares me. Participatory prompt #2: has anyone out there had Lasix, and if so how was the recovery, are you happy with results?
--I love that even though my dog is showing his age more and more, he still acts like a puppy when his favorite squeaky tennis ball is brought out. It's one of those little things that is guaranteed to make me smile no matter what kind of day I'm having. Participatory prompt #3: Tell me something cute that your dog does? Or your cat, or your kid, or whatever other small animal that might be living in your house.
--I really wish I lived within reasonable visiting distance of any of my friends from college or high school. I've been pretty lonely lately.
--I got to teach a couple of classes for my adviser when he was out sick last week, LOVED it. I really get a great feeling from explaining things and convincing bored college students of how kickass my little corner of science is.
--I think it's time for Ryan Gosling to make a new movie, I need a fix.
--According to today's page on my Page-A-Day trivia calendar (nerd alert), it takes 100 gallons of water to grow the average watermelon? Which is approximately how much I always have to pee after eating watermelon...the cycle suddenly makes sense.
--I always, always have a Page-A-Day calendar and at least 2 wall calendars for any given year.
I'm starting to feel at risk of face-planting on the keyboard, so I better sign off. Hope Monday treated everyone well, love y'all.
Monday, January 16, 2012
"Purposeful Practice" in Recovery
I often catch myself taking lessons, quotes, anecdotes, etc, and drawing analogies to EDs/ED recovery. I'm not sure if that's a good or a bad thing, but I think it's probably a pretty normal thing, considering I'm working on recovery with a treatment team and that topic is running in the background of my mind quite a bit.
Anyway, I read a book this weekend (Bounce, by Matthew Syed) that explored the "innate vs acquired skill" issue, mostly in regards to highly performance-oriented activities, such as sports and music. The author's main argument was that skill actually matters very little, and that top athletes, music "prodigies" and the like are actually most likely the results of two overwhelmingly large factors: 1) hard, progress-oriented practice and 2) external environmental advantages (having access to coaches, being in a supportive family, being born in a country/generation where your race/gender is given enough rights to participate in an activity, etc).
In the book Outliers, author Malcolm Gladwell popularized the idea that one needs about 10,000 hours of practice to really achieve professional expertise at an endeavor, although work by Anders Ericsson in the '90s was really the first development of the theory. For example, Tiger Woods is often seen as the ultra golf guru and/or child prodigy, but in reality his father started him off when he could barely walk, and he had racked up thousands and thousands of hours of practice by the time he hit adolescence and the magic 10,000 by his mid-teens. Not to say he had no talent, of course, but if he hadn't worked so incredibly intensely to develop his skills, he wouldn't have been able to perform to such a level as to warrant becoming a sports legend.
One thing that is emphasized, however, is that not just any "practice" counts. If you go out and run the same laps around a track for an hour 10,000 times, you are not really "practicing" in a progress oriented way. You're just repeating a routine (sounds like my life as an overexerciser, actually). What all of the psychologists emphasize is that if you're actually going to improve and build skill, you have to engage in focused practice that tests your limits and pushes you to go beyond your current capacity. It's often painful, and frustrating, and exhausting, but it pays off. One of my favorite quotes from Bounce: "Research across domains shows that it is only by working at what you can't do that you turn into the expert you want to become."
And it goes much deeper than just pushing yourself through the motions, as author/table tennis Olympian Syed points out (emphasis in original): "Sure, clocking up thousands of hours of purposeful practice ultimately determines how far we make it along the path to excellence: but it is only those who care about the destination, whose motivation...is 'internalized,' who are ever going to get there."
All of this seems directly analogous to ED recovery, as I have experienced it at least. It's one thing to go therapy, claim to be in recovery, make certain incremental changes to get you to a point where you're not in acute danger of needing medical hospitalization. Coasting along in sub-clinical complacency is a really common issue for people in recovery, especially since ED sufferers are often highly successful in other areas of their life, making it seem like the status quo with their disease is acceptable.
And yet...actually tackling the core of the ED--and its control over your thoughts and actions--is a whole different ball game. It takes "purposeful practice" that will push you, make you uncomfortable, but also take you beyond what initially seemed possible. It seems like common sense, of course, but making it happen while you're still caught in a disordered quagmire is actually incredibly difficult. And you have to have that 'internalized motivation' to make the changes meaningful enough to stick.
Anyway, as I'm really starting to get serious about the exercise challenges I've set with D., all of this was extremely thought provoking for me. I pride myself in being a hard worker and high achiever in other areas of my life, but when it comes to breaking down ED patterns, I am very prone to just give myself the easy way out, not push myself beyond my comfort zone, and basically roll over and invite the ED to keep kicking my ass. I cut myself slack that I would never tolerate in my professional life.
And I really, really can't keep making excuses for that.
I did a back-of-the envelope calculation, and I'm fairly confident that I've logged over 10,000 hours of exercise since my ED first developed. Of all the things I could be an expert in, being a disordered person was never on my list of goals.
Onwards and upwards, right?
What about you? Have you struggled with complacency or spinning your wheels in recovery? Care to share what finally lit a fire under you to challenge yourself and make progress? I'd love to hear some comments about it.
Anyway, I read a book this weekend (Bounce, by Matthew Syed) that explored the "innate vs acquired skill" issue, mostly in regards to highly performance-oriented activities, such as sports and music. The author's main argument was that skill actually matters very little, and that top athletes, music "prodigies" and the like are actually most likely the results of two overwhelmingly large factors: 1) hard, progress-oriented practice and 2) external environmental advantages (having access to coaches, being in a supportive family, being born in a country/generation where your race/gender is given enough rights to participate in an activity, etc).
In the book Outliers, author Malcolm Gladwell popularized the idea that one needs about 10,000 hours of practice to really achieve professional expertise at an endeavor, although work by Anders Ericsson in the '90s was really the first development of the theory. For example, Tiger Woods is often seen as the ultra golf guru and/or child prodigy, but in reality his father started him off when he could barely walk, and he had racked up thousands and thousands of hours of practice by the time he hit adolescence and the magic 10,000 by his mid-teens. Not to say he had no talent, of course, but if he hadn't worked so incredibly intensely to develop his skills, he wouldn't have been able to perform to such a level as to warrant becoming a sports legend.
One thing that is emphasized, however, is that not just any "practice" counts. If you go out and run the same laps around a track for an hour 10,000 times, you are not really "practicing" in a progress oriented way. You're just repeating a routine (sounds like my life as an overexerciser, actually). What all of the psychologists emphasize is that if you're actually going to improve and build skill, you have to engage in focused practice that tests your limits and pushes you to go beyond your current capacity. It's often painful, and frustrating, and exhausting, but it pays off. One of my favorite quotes from Bounce: "Research across domains shows that it is only by working at what you can't do that you turn into the expert you want to become."
And it goes much deeper than just pushing yourself through the motions, as author/table tennis Olympian Syed points out (emphasis in original): "Sure, clocking up thousands of hours of purposeful practice ultimately determines how far we make it along the path to excellence: but it is only those who care about the destination, whose motivation...is 'internalized,' who are ever going to get there."
All of this seems directly analogous to ED recovery, as I have experienced it at least. It's one thing to go therapy, claim to be in recovery, make certain incremental changes to get you to a point where you're not in acute danger of needing medical hospitalization. Coasting along in sub-clinical complacency is a really common issue for people in recovery, especially since ED sufferers are often highly successful in other areas of their life, making it seem like the status quo with their disease is acceptable.
And yet...actually tackling the core of the ED--and its control over your thoughts and actions--is a whole different ball game. It takes "purposeful practice" that will push you, make you uncomfortable, but also take you beyond what initially seemed possible. It seems like common sense, of course, but making it happen while you're still caught in a disordered quagmire is actually incredibly difficult. And you have to have that 'internalized motivation' to make the changes meaningful enough to stick.
Anyway, as I'm really starting to get serious about the exercise challenges I've set with D., all of this was extremely thought provoking for me. I pride myself in being a hard worker and high achiever in other areas of my life, but when it comes to breaking down ED patterns, I am very prone to just give myself the easy way out, not push myself beyond my comfort zone, and basically roll over and invite the ED to keep kicking my ass. I cut myself slack that I would never tolerate in my professional life.
And I really, really can't keep making excuses for that.
I did a back-of-the envelope calculation, and I'm fairly confident that I've logged over 10,000 hours of exercise since my ED first developed. Of all the things I could be an expert in, being a disordered person was never on my list of goals.
Onwards and upwards, right?
What about you? Have you struggled with complacency or spinning your wheels in recovery? Care to share what finally lit a fire under you to challenge yourself and make progress? I'd love to hear some comments about it.
Thursday, January 12, 2012
Era II of Sessions with D. And some bad news.
As I mentioned last week, I resumed sessions with my dietician (D.) this week. It was nice to catch up with her, and she told me that she always has mixed feelings about seeing clients she likes again--good to see them, but bad that they still need the help. Anyway, even though I like her a lot and she is friendly, she didn't hesitate to jump into ass-kicking mode. Which, of course, is why I went back to her, because although I like T. for a lot of things, she is way too easy on me.
No such problem with D. I think the part of our session that stuck with me the most was this:
D: When do you think this is going to come easy to you? Do you think that if you just carry on complacently, in two weeks, or two months, or two years, you will spontaneously decide that it's okay to cut the exercise, gain weight, and shed the eating disorder? How has that worked for you over the past 12 years? If you keep just waiting around for that to happen, you will be stuck in this lifestyle for the rest of your life. Some things are important to do not in spite of being hard, but because they are hard.
Indeed.
We set some concrete exercise reduction goals, stepwise fashion. Funnysad moment: she suggested an increment to decrease, and I agreed to do that the first week...but then she clarified that she wanted it done the first DAY. My bad...
I chickened out of compliance the first two days, but I actually stepped up and did it yesterday. I chewed all of my fingernails off in the process, but I survived and didn't compensate by cutting food. In reality, I know that it wasn't a very meaningful amount, energy-balance wise. It's amazing how that doesn't really seem to matter, I still get anxious in an OCD way.
I have my first session with T. since before the holidays today, so I guess I'll go over all of this with her. D. also wants me to get labwork done, so some bloodletting is in my near future, joy. I will probably gripe, but I honestly don't think I would make much progress on some things without seeing her regularly again. My mom agreed to help me pay for sessions (she fell all over herself to do it. #baddaughterguilt), so that is taken care of, although I still hate to have to ask.
This morning brought some pretty depressing news: Match didn't get into any of his PhD options that are within. 10 hours of any of the ones I am still considering. Fuck. He literally called me in tears when he found out. We are both very aware that doing this distance thing for another 4-5 years, including periods when I am out of the country for 4-6 months at a time, could be a game-changer...or a game-ender. We are taking it a day at a time, but there is definitely a shadow over things now.
No such problem with D. I think the part of our session that stuck with me the most was this:
D: When do you think this is going to come easy to you? Do you think that if you just carry on complacently, in two weeks, or two months, or two years, you will spontaneously decide that it's okay to cut the exercise, gain weight, and shed the eating disorder? How has that worked for you over the past 12 years? If you keep just waiting around for that to happen, you will be stuck in this lifestyle for the rest of your life. Some things are important to do not in spite of being hard, but because they are hard.
Indeed.
We set some concrete exercise reduction goals, stepwise fashion. Funnysad moment: she suggested an increment to decrease, and I agreed to do that the first week...but then she clarified that she wanted it done the first DAY. My bad...
I chickened out of compliance the first two days, but I actually stepped up and did it yesterday. I chewed all of my fingernails off in the process, but I survived and didn't compensate by cutting food. In reality, I know that it wasn't a very meaningful amount, energy-balance wise. It's amazing how that doesn't really seem to matter, I still get anxious in an OCD way.
I have my first session with T. since before the holidays today, so I guess I'll go over all of this with her. D. also wants me to get labwork done, so some bloodletting is in my near future, joy. I will probably gripe, but I honestly don't think I would make much progress on some things without seeing her regularly again. My mom agreed to help me pay for sessions (she fell all over herself to do it. #baddaughterguilt), so that is taken care of, although I still hate to have to ask.
This morning brought some pretty depressing news: Match didn't get into any of his PhD options that are within. 10 hours of any of the ones I am still considering. Fuck. He literally called me in tears when he found out. We are both very aware that doing this distance thing for another 4-5 years, including periods when I am out of the country for 4-6 months at a time, could be a game-changer...or a game-ender. We are taking it a day at a time, but there is definitely a shadow over things now.
Wednesday, January 11, 2012
Breaking Down Eating Disorder Stereotypes
If you haven't yet discovered Arielle's "Wednesday Warrior" videos, then you are missing out. They are all great, but this week's video, challenging common stereotypes about eating disorders, is so important that I just wanted to give it a shout-out. I think it's really useful for both ED sufferers and anyone who knows/is close to someone with an ED.
I personally have dealt with a lot of frustration and shame about struggling with an ED for so long (literally half my life now), partly because of everything that it has taken from my life and partly because the issue can so commonly be seen as a shallow, selfish problem. This latter assumption is not true (it's always so much easier to say that objectively than to apply it to yourself), and I really, really think it's important to broadcast that message.
I personally have dealt with a lot of frustration and shame about struggling with an ED for so long (literally half my life now), partly because of everything that it has taken from my life and partly because the issue can so commonly be seen as a shallow, selfish problem. This latter assumption is not true (it's always so much easier to say that objectively than to apply it to yourself), and I really, really think it's important to broadcast that message.
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