I have some family in town for the event, and we went out to dinner tonight, along with a couple of my friends from my Master's program.
And who actually ate a granola bar right before leaving the house for dinner, because I knew was too hungry and low-blood sugary to last through the drive/ordering/waiting for service? Me.
Who ate a regular sized, unplanned-for piece of the unplanned jalapeño cheesy bread that came before meal ? Me.
Who sat and enjoyed the conversation for an hour after we finished eating without feeling restless or worrying about working off the food (non-salad entree) or microcalculating how many calories had been in it? Me.
Who is so pleased and thrilled to be acting like a normal person that it almost comes full circle to being afraid of being so happy because it means there is a chance of a crashing failure? You guessed it, me.
Who is the only one that can prevent that from happening? . . . Me. Tall order but someone has to do it I guess.
By the way, thanks for all the positive feedback on the last post. I was so worried people would be upset about me posting the old picture, even though it had been on the blog before. In retrospect, when I originally posted that back in 2008 I had NO idea of how unhealthy it looked, sorry ladies. :s Perceptions are odd. Anyway, I was glad that at least everyone that commented seemed to get the message I was trying to get across, about how being healthy both looks and feels so much better and is worth the whole damn fight. It also makes me feel less anxious about relaxing some habits in order to bump my weight up a bit like D. wants (possibly why tonight's dinner went so well).
Alright, going to defend the hell out of this thesis tomorrow! Here's hoping I don't get tongue tied, tuck my skirt into my panties or discover the file for my presentation has fatally corrupted on me between my apartment and campus in the morning.
6 comments:
Yuuusssss!! Good luck with your defense tomorrow, I will be thinking about you! And...I like your tatt more now. :)
Good luck with your defense tomorrow!! You're going to be awesome!
SOOOOOOOOO happy for you! Mission: Act-Like-a-Normal-Person is progressing very well! You would have never posted a night like this when I first started reading your blog three years ago or so! Very cool, Cam, very cool!
What an awesome night! You have come SO far. I'm so proud and happy for you. Good luck today, you're gonna do amazing!
I hope the defense went well--I'm sure you were awesome! Congrats on the steps forward with the dinner out, especially while under pre-defense stress. That's amazing; it made me smile to read that. Can't wait to hear about how it all went!
Good luck for tomorrow! I'm sure that you will do a fabulous job :-) I cannot wait to read all about how you blew their socks off!!
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